Sunday Screening

Everybody, this is Corb Lund. Corb, this is everybody. Now that we're all acquainted, let's hear some music.

CORB LUND is Canadian -- I know, me writing about Canadian music, you're shocked -- from Alberta, to be specific, and he plays country music (variously, along "the Corb Lund Band" or, lately, the wonderfully named "Hurtin' Albertans"). But it's not really country like most people understand it. Yes, there's yodeling in this song (which is part of a long tradition, actually, going back to Jimmie Rodgers who is arguably the founder of country music); but more than that, Corb Lund's music is just weird. Dense, inscrutable, sometimes deliberately stupid and sometimes deadly serious; you won't hear much else like it. Here's another example:

Now, I'm no fan of that video -- can't quite tell if it's a deliberate throwback to grunge, or just cheap and ADD-addled, but either way I'll pass -- but the song is just great. (That line: "This is grape juice and cheap vodka, man! This isn't even wine!" kills me every time. Not to mention it's an excuse to bring up the recent ridiculousness involving PZ Myers and a Communion wafer, which you should look at if you need more proof that this country's religious right is completely unhinged). You can hear the obvious Dylan influence in this one, but it's got that rootsy twist to it that adds a new dimension. Here's another, much more serious (and political) song -- follow the lyrics now:

Corb Lund's music, like a lot of Canadian rock, is an acquired taste. (I'm thinking here specifically of the Tragically Hip, whose songs are so dense both lyrically and musically that it often takes dozens of listenings before you can unravel them -- and that's not counting the YEARS of radio acclimation you need before you can get past Gord Downie's weird-ass voice.) But once you acquire it, man, do you ever acquire it; I've been spending a lot of time lately trying to tease out "Expectation and the Blues," under the logic that any country song which rhymes "over-intellectualize" with "self-actualize" must be worth understanding. (Here's a little low-quality snippet, if you're hardy enough to try it for yourself).

And it's not like he doesn't have a sense of humor. Here's "The Truck Got Stuck," one of Corb's most irresistibly dumb and catchy songs -- I warn you now, this is a talking blues about trucks getting stuck in mud, and if you hear it you WILL have it playing in your head for days. Listen:

(Agriculture Canada is our equivalent of the USDA, incidentally. Many Canadian federal agencies are just the name of what they do with the word "Canada" tacked on -- "Health Canada", ""Environment Canada", "Sport Canada", "Western Economic Diversification Canada", etc. You get used to it.)

Anyway; if you want to hear more Corb Lund, his albums are in all the usual places. I recommend eMusic, which sells real DRM-free MP3s at sensible prices ($10 for 30), and has a catalog of everything you need (they just don't carry the major labels, which is fine, because all that mainstream shit is on the filesharing networks anyway). Meanwhile, enjoy the rest of your weekends; this is an open thread.

Bush & Paulson's Awful New Financial "Regulation" Scheme

STILL IN CANADA STOP -- CAN ONLY COMMUNICATE BY TELEGRAM STOP -- LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT STOP --

WASHINGTON (AP) -- The Bush administration is proposing a sweeping overhaul of the way the government regulates the nation's financial services industry from banks and securities firms to mortgage brokers and insurance companies.

The plan would give major new powers to the Federal Reserve... the Fed would be given broad authority to oversee financial market stability.

SOUNDS GOOD RIGHT STOP -- EXCEPT THE ACTUAL PLAN DOES NO SUCH THING STOP --

While the plan could expose Wall Street investment banks and hedge funds to greater scrutiny, it carefully avoids a call for tighter regulation.

The plan would not rein in practices that have been linked to the housing and mortgage crisis, like packaging risky subprime mortgages into securities carrying the highest ratings.

The plan would give the Fed some authority over Wall Street firms, but only when an investment bank’s practices threatened the entire financial system.

And the plan does not recommend tighter rules over the vast and largely unregulated markets for risk sharing and hedging, like credit default swaps, which are supposed to insure lenders against loss but became a speculative instrument themselves and gave many institutions a false sense of security.

Parts of the plan could reduce the power of the Securities and Exchange Commission, which is charged with maintaining orderly stock and bond markets and protecting investors... The blueprint also suggests several areas where the S.E.C. should take a lighter approach to its oversight. Among them are allowing stock exchanges greater leeway to regulate themselves and streamlining the approval of new products, even allowing automatic approval of securities products that are being traded in foreign markets.

IF THIS IS "BROAD AUTHORITY" THEN I'M THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND STOP -- IT'S JUST A TROJAN HORSE FOR RIGHT-WING DEREGULATIONISM STOP -- ANYONE WHO THINKS THIS WILL END THE CURRENT FINANCIAL CRISIS NEEDS THEIR HEAD EXAMINED STOP -- THIS IS WHY WE NEED DEMOCRATS IN POWER STOP

ENJOY THE REST OF SPRING BREAK AND SEE YOU ALL NEXT WEEK STOP

My exciting spring break plans

Spring forecast? More winter

...climatologist David Phillips is forecasting that the next 30 days will be colder than normal in the Toronto area. "People are tired of winter and it's wearing them down," said the senior climatologist with Environment Canada...

At this time of year, we should be seeing daytime highs of 6C, but "we'll be lucky to get above freezing," he said. Phillips expects the first month of spring to be colder than normal across the country.

Incredibly, this was not the most exciting article in the Toronto Star today -- that title goes to the heartbreaking "Police Shoot Runaway Cow". (Nut graf: "Two of the animals ended up in the backyard of a home where they calmly munched on shrubs and bushes." Story of my life.)

But yeah, that's what I'm doing over "spring" break. Expect little more than radio silence until we're back in 10 days -- although I will be employing the latest and greatest in Canadian telecommunications, which I gather have progressed these recent decades. Hope everyone has a good break, and feel free to share your equally exciting plans in comments.

P.S. Here is some video Kyle took of yesterday's antiwar rally, which was lent a certain dramatic quality by the rain and misery everywhere. I also expect our old friend the guy by the door, who took copious photographs, will post some shortly.

P.P.S. Congratulations to all the freshmen who were granted admission to Mather University today -- including Dem Apples' own Will Weingarten, now a made man. And my condolences to all of you who were assigned to other, inferior houses.

Canada Becomes Campaign Issue, My Life Becomes Complete

I read that John McCain said this and I almost pissed myself:

"One of our greatest assets we have in Afghanistan today, frankly, are our Canadian friends," he said. "It's very controversial in Canada, their commitment and the suffering and the losses they have faced. And we need, we need our Canadian friends and we need their continued support in Afghanistan.

"So what do we do? The two Democrat candidates for president say that they're going to unilaterally, they're going to unilaterally abrogate the North American Free Trade Agreement. Our biggest trading partner, they're going -- who we made a solemn agreement with -- they're gonna unilaterally abrogate that. Now, how do you think the Canadian people are going to react to that –- who we are having now their enormous and invaluable assistance in Afghanistan and we're going to abrogate a free trade agreement?"

1. I find it rather amusing that John "Tears Of Blood" McCain, who has promised he would follow Osama bin Laden "to the gates of hell", is afraid of annoying these people:

Above: "Eh?"

2. Someone should inform John McCain that Canadians hate NAFTA. We see it as yet another bit of Canadian sovereignty being eaten away by our big annoying neighbor -- the Conservative Party was nearly annihilated in the 1993 election after they enacted it. It's like Ohio up there.

3. Senator McCain, our decision of whether to continue fighting and dying in Afghanistan is not predicated on our feelings toward American politicians, you ass.

and 4. Given the choice, Canadians would prefer a Democratic president in 2008 to a Republican one by 34% to 5%. (And I bet most of the Republican 5% is comedians who enjoy humiliating them.)

In sum, I have no idea what McCain was thinking there, but he really ought to check his facts the next time he appeals to Canada as a rationale for his presidential bid. It makes me worry for the man's mental health. This has been your Canadian Update; we now return to our regularly scheduled programming.

I'll make a quick diversion from the primaries

to point out something irritating, to say the least: Health Canada, the Canadian government's... well... health department (right? Markus?), has banned gay men from donating organs. More precisely, any man who has had sex with another man in the last five years can't donate an organ. Hat tip to Jason Cable on this one, since I certainly didn't know, but the US has the same policy; see section IV.E.1. Nor can men donate blood in the US under FDA regulations if they've had sex with a man anytime since 1977.

For reasons you will probably understand, this is distressing; it reveals a tremendous lack of understanding on the FDA's part. Much like the exclusion of gays from serving openly in the armed forces, the exclusions rest on mediocre excuses that veil prejudice. We're not supposed to serve in the military because we scare off all the straight people and undermine camaraderie, even though that's never been proven; we're not supposed to give blood or organs since we'll dirty up the supply, even though donated tissues are always tested for HIV. On behalf of all the gays out there, let me say to the FDA and anyone else who somehow missed the memo that we don't all have AIDS. In fact, I'm pretty sure that most of us don't have AIDS. Additionally, while we're on the topic of earth-shaking revelations, straight people can also have AIDS. The solution to the AIDS crisis isn't stigmatizing people who have AIDS or who belong to groups that are at higher risk of acquiring HIV, and it certainly isn't prejudice - we need a levelheaded approach, and categorically excluding gay men sure as hell isn't it.

Christmas

In the vast snow-covered parking lot of the Canadian Tire (Patriotic Big-Box Hardware & Machismo Superstore) this afternoon--

--my sainted mother and I had the following conversation:

MY SAINTED MOTHER: "I don't think I got you enough presents."
ME: "I don't care."
MOTHER: "Oh good."
ME: "Actually I think this whole thing is kind of stupid."
MOTHER: "Me too."

We proceeded to go into the Patriotic Big-Box Hardware & Machismo Superstore, purchased $40 in gift cards for my cousins' various husbands, and spent the rest of the day doing much the same thing.

QUESTION FOR THE CLASS: why? Why the hell do we persist in this expensive and unnecessary holiday even when neither of us seem to care? Please explain.

Sunday Screening

So Esquire did a widely-linked online piece the other day about the worst fight scenes ever made. They range from humorously awkward to unwatchably gory, but the highlight by far is this one:

The jingoist in me wants to make a snide comment about why France keeps losing wars... but instead I'd just like to ask how I can get to be so badass that I can injure people like that using only the tips of my fingers. (And then continue with my aerobics, apparently.)

Much as I love the French, they do seem to have a bit of trouble when they try to appropriate American culture (Jerry Lewis notwithstanding). Obviously Japan is the master of awkward appropriation, but France is no slouch -- I love the way Serge Gainsbourg and Brigitte Bardot decided to interpret Bonnie & Clyde. It's a good song, but something got lost in translation here:

Of course this all might make more sense if you spoke French. I do not speak French; that is a testament to the strength of the Ontario educational system, which spent nine years teaching me French with such vigor and seriousness that I grew annoyed and deliberately forgot it all as soon as I entered tenth grade. About all that remains of my bilingual education is some vague memories of Telefrancais videos, which we'd watch when the teacher was too high tired to actually teach. These videos were... uh... well, see for yourself:

Drought: Upsides and Downsides

I see where Atlanta's running out of water. This is a serious problem:

The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers estimates that Lake Lanier, the city's reservoir, may run out of clean water in about 110 days. The area has received just 25 inches (64 centimeters) of rain this year, half the usual amount. The scarcity of tropical systems is one reason, said Dan Dixon, a National Weather Service meteorologist in Miami.

Governor Sonny Perdue on Oct. 20 declared a state of emergency in 85 counties, and three days later ordered utilities and water systems to reduce consumption by 10 percent. He urged Georgians to keep their cars dirty as a badge of honor.

[...]The shortfall is hurting some companies and employees. An estimated 14,000 landscaping workers in the Atlanta area have been laid off since June... recreational fishing is in a slump... Further water cutbacks may leave Georgia's chicken producers high and dry.

Of course these effects are tiny compared to what might happen in the city if the reservoir ran completely empty. It would be a failure of infrastructure on an unthinkable scale. (And given that the Governor of Georgia thinks the solution to this problem involves asking people not to wash their cars, I would not rule such a possibility out.)

Maybe one of our environmental experts (*cough*KAREN*cough*) can tell me whether the Georgia drought behind this is feasibly a result of global warming; I wouldn't be surprised if it was, though of course there have been droughts since time immemorial. Either way, the ginormous population growth Atlanta's been experiencing this decade seems to be coming back to bite them. These are the kinds of problems we should begin to expect in our super-sized cities over the coming years...

...However, there is one unequivocally good consequence of this situation. From the same Bloomberg article:

Stone Mountain Park canceled plans for a snow-making, winter-themed attraction because it would require 1.2 million gallons of water to complete. The park features granite carvings of Confederate war heroes and a light show.

I... I just... snow next to Confederate soldiers... THANKS, DROUGHT!

For more on this (not the theme park), read the excellent Atlanta Water Shortage Blog.

Why I Like Canada

Because it's so refreshing to see headlines like this:

Tax supporters rally at City Hall

Toronto Star -- Dozens of supporters of Mayor David Miller's new taxes for Toronto, decked out in yellow scarves, rallied in front of City Hall and then flocked into the council chamber this morning.

Council votes at its meeting starting today on Miller's proposed land transfer tax and vehicle registration tax -- measures that will raise as much as $356 million a year for the city...

"When I say Service, you say Fees! Service!" "FEES!" "Service!" "FEES..."

...Of course this is all so much political theater, and the Toronto Star -- long in the pocket of the Liberal Party -- is nobody's ideal of objective journalism. Still there's no doubt that in Canada, taxes are viewed in a much different light than the United States; from my experience they're generally seen as a fair tradeoff for our outstanding health-care system, strong schools, lack of toll roads, etc. There is comparatively little political hay to be made out of tax as an issue; if voting in '84 Canadians would have elected Walter Mondale--

--in a landslide.

As would many other First World countries, actually. It's a peculiarly American, specifically right-wing American, thing to rail categorically against taxes; even here, for decades (especially post-New Deal) that was the kind of thing only a Goldwater-caliber wingnut would campaign on. But for whatever reason, anti-tax mania took over our discourse during the Reagan and Gingrich eras, to the point where these days an American pol won't let even a suggestion of new taxes slip his lip for fear of political crucifixion. Today's Republicans -- the party of Fiscal Responsibility, recall -- find themselves running up ginormous deficits and/or slashing social programs rather than touch even a marginal rate; and frankly Democrats are little better. Even the 2008 frontrunners, who are on the whole more progressive than we've seen in quite a while, won't allow afor nything more harsh than a rollback of the Bush cuts and maybe a slight increase on the wealthy / capital gains; these moves, though laudable, are baby steps. We have candidates who pledge to create universal health care, a stable Iraq, and all other such wonderful things, but for political reasons won't go near the tough fiscal moves necessary to pay for them. Once one of them is actually in office, of course, this may create something of a problem.

What we have to remember is that taxes are not, in and of themselves, normatively or politically problematic -- rather it's a specific function of this country's politics in the past 30 years. And I think that that anti-tax attitude is reaching the end of its shelf life; supply-side economics are totally discredited (among the sane), there's no Ron Reagan in sight, and on the whole fiscal issues are losing their salience behind more pressing concerns like job security, health care, and of course the war. (This, I wrote a while ago, is a big problem for Rudy Giuliani, whose campaign on non-terrorism issues is totally a 1980s throwback.) The more conservatarian bits of the Republican base may still be crowing about big government, but Reagan Democrats certainly aren't anymore; in today's economy the concern is less "I wish I wasn't paying so much tax" and more "I wish I had a job." (Not to mention, given the subprime market, "I wish I had a house.") If the economy continues in its current pattern it won't be long before the middle class is willing to accept (maybe even expect) some reasonable tax increases in exchange for a stable home and community; at which point, events like the one in Toronto today won't seem nearly so far-fetched.

Sunday Screening

So I was planning a whole post about interstate highway sign lettering, the history of the telephone system, and French children's TV; but I had to can it when I saw this. Holy mother.

...Words fail.

You're probably familiar with Gene Kelly, and you're almost certainly familiar with Judy Garland, but I bet you hadn't seen that. It's from The Pirate, a 1948 Vincente Minelli picture that per Wikipedia was one of the first major "box office flops." One can see why.

The MGM musicals were always better when they didn't rely on "exotic" locales to spruce up their scenes; it made the talent less lazy. In this case I think both Kelly and Garland knew it didn't matter, and they decided to just have fun with it. Kelly looks like he's about to bust out laughing through this entire thing.

FUN FACT: This was one of only three films that Judy Garland and Gene Kelly ever did together. Of the others, one was 1942's For Me and My Gal, an otherwise boring Busby Berkeley propaganda film that gave Kelly his screen debut; and the other was 1950's Summer Stock, Judy Garland's last MGM project. (She would later do A Star is Born as well as her incredible appearance in Judgement at Nuremberg and a couple other things, but by that point the drugs were taking their toll.) Summer Stock is best remembered for this stunning, and somewhat creepy, number:

Gives me chills. This was the last part of Summer Stock to be filmed; it was an incredibly tough project, mainly because Judy Garland was having severe struggles with addiction even then, and in this scene you can tell Judy is some 20 pounds lighter than she was in the rest of the movie.

Anyway, also, here's some bonus Gene Kelly being funny:

If by some colossal failure of education you haven't seen Singin' in the Rain, this guy has helpfully put it all up on YouTube (I'm sure the authorities will come grab it any day now, so get it while you can) -- parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. And I at least insist you watch the Moses Supposes scene, which is possibly the greatest thing ever committed to film.

...Well, that's it. (Posting from me will be sporadic over the next few weeks, since I'm going home to Canada. For those who aren't familiar with it, visiting my Canadian hometown is like stepping into 1987; Kim Mitchell is routinely on the radio, and cellphones are scary things that city people use. My Internet connection up there is still delivering news about the Dukakis campaign. So I leave Dem Apples in the capable hands of Sam, Garrett, Rob, Cora, and anyone else who wants to post. Enjoy the rest of the summer, everyone.)

Sunday Screening (Canada Day Edition)

Happy Canada Day, everyone. Today, July 1, I and my countrymen celebrate our nation's quasi-independence, and our many proud national accomplishments, whatever they are. In honour of this occasion I present some videos that encapsulate the Canada I know:

Read more »

NO, HILLARY, PLEASE, NO

She chose her campaign song. I am going to cry.

"You and I" by Celine Dion.

This shitty song has special significance for us Canadians, who have had to endure it on TV all through this decade in commercials for our shitty national airline, Air Canada. For instance, see the following video, which I should warn you is not for the weak:

(shudder)

Anyway, though, I'm sure a lot of people will try to make political hay out of this. They're going to accuse Hillary of choosing a Canadian song instead of an American one, and use that to suggest she's unpatriotic, or that she doesn't respect homegrown American music. That's bullshit and I'll tell you why: Celine Dion is not Canadian. Her music can probably be considered an act of treason against Canada; we have publicly apologized for her on multiple occasions; and besides, all her shows are in Vegas now. Celine Dion is about as Canadian as that Taliban spokesman guy is American. Of course I don't know if it's technically been said officially yet, so to be safe let me just get it out there:

On behalf of all Canadians, I hereby disown Celine Dion.

There. She's yours now. Deal with it, USA.

...And a message to the Clinton campaign: if you use this song as your telephone hold music, just FYI, it'll be a matter of weeks before some enraged vendor comes to New York and sets fire to the office. Might want to be careful about that.

Blogsnacks 9/5/2006

Just some gruel to chew on, as we count the days to Camp Harvard...

- Hearty congratulations to our incoming Membership Director, Rob Winikates, and his all-star team of Yard Captains: Jenessa, Elizabeth, Indira, and Sergio.

– Ben White has found — maybe “dredged up” is a better a word — a couple of new blogs which will focus on Ivy League gossip. They are called, in two stunning displays of originality, IvyLeak and IvyGate. Take a look for yourself; they are so terrifyingly elitist, cliquey, and vapid they make Scene Magazine look like the goddamn Socialist Worker. I expect them to be smashingly successful.

– Dick Cheney is coming to the Harvard Club on the 8th — which is, of course, just before all the students move in, so expect tiny protests at best. What a happy coincidence of timing!

– Post your predictions for 2006 in Harlan’s thread. I dare you to be more optimistic than me! (Hint: that is not possible.)

– Take a look at this chart of median-income declines since 1999, from the Detroit Free Press (MI was worst-hit of all states). If you’re into economics maybe you can make something of Mike Shedlock’s analysis, which to me is frightening in a vague, generalized, don’t-quite-grasp-the-basics kind of way. (This is also how I feel about oil prices, global warming, and Cats.)

– News from up here in Canada: Somebody really needs to tell the U.S. contigent in Afghanistan to, y’know, quit killing us.

– An actual question from me, to our Californians: is Arnold a lost cause or what? Huh? What’s going on out there? (Also, how come Feinstein’s Senate challenger has a porn name?)

– And of course, R.I.P. Steve Irwin, aka Crocodile Hunter. At last, even if only in death, he is not a punchline; really that’s all that any of us can ask.

Have I missed anything? Consider this an open thread.
Also, if there are any Class of 2010 reading, please introduce yourselves! We’d love to know who we’ll be dealing with, so when frosh week rolls around we can prepare for the ritualistic sacrifices. (No! Just kidding, frosh! Please come to Dems introductory events! Especially if you have all your organs!)